There is no way Nanni can write the Daily Blog today. She is wandering around in a bit of a daze, with a soppy, but happy, look on her face, all the while muttering: “Ten! Ten!”
No, it’s nothing to do with Ben Ten (of whom I have vaguely heard, though I am far too young to be one of his fans, being still at the Iggle Piggle stage for the most part) – she is just
absorbing the astounding fact that, come December, her Extraordinary Eight grandchildren (of whom I am the youngest but by no means the least extraordinary) will become the Tremendous Ten. Yes, you heard it aright, my Mummy, whom Nanni calls the Middle
of the Darling Daughters, is going to have TWINS. And I, Faris (for yes, it is I who is blogging tonight, in case you hadn’t guessed) will become a Big Brother.
When I first heard about it, I wasn’t quite sure what I thought exactly. You would have imagined, wouldn’t you, that having me would be quite enough for any parents. But there are always two ways of looking at life. Nanni has taught me this.
She says you either see your glass as half-full or half-empty. I don’t understand this at all. Nanni wears glasses (I don’t know if they are half full or half empty or, indeed, half of anything) and it is one of my absolute favourite games to try
to snatch them from her nose before she can stop me. I wait till she has picked me up and puts her face close to mine to give me a kiss and then – swoosh! – I have plucked the glasses from her face and am waving them about triumphantly. It is a
great game and I never tire of it. Nanni isn't quite so keen on it, as games go.
Anyway, when I really started to think about the Big Brother Business, I realised
that it is a tremendous compliment to me and proof, if proof were needed, that Mummy and Daddy have enjoyed the last fifteen and a half months. So much so that they decided they needed to add to our family not by one but by two. Stellar!
I am not sure exactly what is expected of a Big Brother and to be honest my friends haven’t been much help. Sebastian, who is my pal at nursery, couldn’t offer any advice
at all, though we were both pretty well totally engaged with the sand and water table at the time so I probably hadn’t chosen the best moment for a Lads’ Heart to Heart. I also think I may well be the first of my friends to become a Big Brother
so once again I will be Leading the Way.
These are, therefore, simply my First Thoughts which I am sure I shall refine as events unfold. First and foremost,
being a Big Brother will certainly be a sponsorability. I shall need to set an example, which will mean showing the Twins how to create even more Merry Mayhem in our happy house. I have been pretty good at this, though I say it myself as shouldn’t
(as Nanni would tell me) but just think what three of us will be able to get up to! I will be the ring-leader, of course, because I am the Big Brother. I will teach them how to splash in the bath, how to knock Monkey Monkey off the palm tree in the Jungle
Forest play mat, how to commando crawl and one day even how to walk, now that I have mastered the art myself. I will show them how to hurl their toys under the sofa so that nobody, not even Daddy with his long arms, can reach them – that’s
always a good trick. I mean, I am hoping that they will have toys of their own? Will they each come with a ready-pack of baby toys? I won’t have to share ALL my toys, will I?
Which brings me to another point. Where will they come from? I have never seen new babies in Tescos or Sainsbury’s and I am pretty sure I would have noticed if there had been any there – even if they had been on the top
shelves, out of harm’s way. Someone said they come from the hospital but I never saw any babies when I was in hospital a couple of months ago. The best thing about being in hospital was having my very own TV set in my cot – it was almost (but not
quite) worth being ill for that. I wonder why we didn’t just pick up a couple of babies while we were there – it would have saved all the waiting.
can tell I am getting excited now. I just wish they could be here straightaway and that I didn’t have to wait so long to see them. I mean I will be twenty-one months – that’s practically GROWN-UP - by the time they arrive.
My twins will be Double Trouble and that’s just the way I like it. Nanni says they will be double the trouble, double the fun, double the laughter, double the love.
Nanni always goes Over The Top.