I have been selected for Team Nutella! For one such as I, this is the equivalent of making the British Olympics Cycling Team.
You see, at school I was the girl who was
always the last to be picked for the team. I do not bear a grudge; had I been the Team Captain, I wouldn't have chosen myself either. Not if the Team Task involved any kind of ball. Not, moreover, if that ball had to be thrown, caught or batted a great distance.
I always think it is helpful to know one's limitations though this does not imply that one should not attempt to overcome them. Even if only on the beach playing French cricket with the grandchildren who are all better at catching, throwing and batting than
I am, with the exception of The Twinkles who, being only eight months old, still have Everything To Aim For.
I do not know exactly what membership of Team Nutella will mean for me - apart, of course, from
the undoubted prestige. I didn't have to pass a test or demonstrate any specific skills. My sole qualification comes from being the grandparent of the Team Captain who just happens to be the esteemed Hazel Bagel aka Nutti.
The background, as I understand it, is this: Hazel and brother Jack recently spent a full-on fortnight up in Aberdeen with the Youth Music Theatre UK, performing in a brand-new production called The Coorie Cave. In my innocence, I imagined this would
be some folksy tale of medieval mystery but apparently it was all about zombies. Of which (whom?) I know very little. Among the many friends they made was one Finn Daniel Ella.
According to the review in the
esteemed Aberdeen Express, he had everyone chuckling at his portrayal of a "zealous character" who went by the name of Malcolm. No, I'm sorry I don't know if Malcolm was a zombie or not, it doesn't exactly sound like a zombie name but then, what is? Anyway,
according to Hazel, while she is the Captain of Team Nutella, Finn is the captain of Team Finnella which makes a certain amount of sense, I suppose, in a zombie-like kind of way.
Once I find out what is required
of me as a member of Team Nutella, I shall be sure to let you know. If, on the other hand, I am given a free transfer to Team Finnella, you will know that my performance as a Team Member has proved a disappointment to Captain, My Captain.
Hazel tells me that she introduced the other members of the cast of The Coorie Cave to the Daily Blog and she is loyally sure that they have all become avid readers. I have therefore been requested to mention YMT in my blog.
I am reasonably confident that, in obeying my granddaughter's instruction, I will not fall foul of new regulations on blogging issued today by the Advertising Standards Authority. It would be fantastic, however, to add a team of zombies to my regular readers
- so, all you YMTers, if you are reading this, Salutations from me to you!
My granddaughter is missing all the great new friends she made in Aberdeen and, being spread out all across the country, I fear they
are also missing out on Hazel's current social whirl.
Yes, indeed, Our Hazel is a Party Animal who needs no excuse for a gathering. Tomorrow at 11 a.m. she will turn up at school for her GCSE results - so,
in typical Hazel fashion, tonight she will be at a Pre-Results Party to take everybody's mind off the next day's trials, tribulations and, fingers crossed, triumphs. Tomorrow night will see a get-together to mark Results Night. I am hoping it will be a Right
Royal Celebration all round.
Oh, yes, indeed (you are, as usual, there before me) that will be followed on Friday evening by a Post-Results Party. When you are a Party Animal, you have to be prepared to,
well, party. And why have one party, when you can have three? As I always say.
Now, here's the thing: as a member of Team Nutella, am I too required to be a Party Animal? And, if so, which animal! Do I need
to address my dress? Review my views on life, love and liberty? Check out some In-jokes, perhaps? Though possibly not.
We are Team Nutella. And proud of it.