I am now a home-owner! Which is pretty good going, considering I won't be three years old until next March.
Yes, this is Faris, taking over the Daily Blog while Nanni
has a restful day with Grandad, recovering from all the Christmas shenanigans. What fun we all had! There was food, there were presents, there were Christmas trees and there were crackers - though these were to pull, rather than to eat. Personally, I think
this kind of cracker is vastly over-rated but Nanni was most excited by the snap, crack and paper hat. All the grown-ups read out the riddles and tried to guess the answers. I'm not surprised they made everyone groan - though Nanni tells me that this is the
Whole Point of Cracker Jokes. As I say, I'd prefer the edible variety of cracker, preferably with a nice bit of cheese...
Anyway, you will want to hear how I came to own a house. It was, as you might have
guessed, a Christmas present from Nanni and Grandad. I have to share it with The Twinkles but at least we don't have a mortgage. Whatever that is. Mummy says we are lucky not to have a mortgage - I think it may be another word for some kind of serious and
life-affecting illness. Like chicken pox, but much, much worse.
The house was waiting downstairs on Christmas morning, all ready for us to move in. It was covered in a sheet which Mummy removed with a flourish
so that we could see it in All Its Glory. We - that's Tala, Lilia and I, not Mummy who is a bit too big to get through the door - have hardly been out of it since we took possession. In the Summer, Daddy will move it into the garden, but for the time being
it can stay indoors in the warm.
Inside the house we have a kitchen, with a sink and a telephone. All mod cons, you might say. Auntie Karen has given us a microwave and Auntie Anne has given us lots of pretend
food so that we can practise our cooking. One day when we are much older - say three and a half, in my case - we may be allowed to cook real food in the real kitchen and won't forever be being warned: "Hot! Hot!" every time we walk too near the oven while
our fish fingers are being cooked.
I love everything about Christmas (apart from the crackers) especially getting together with all the family. Obviously I couldn't allow the whole occasion to pass without
a bit of Rampaging. Despite all my careful coaching, The Twinkles are far too well-behaved for my liking. Though give them time.
My cousin Morgan was at Nanni's house when we visited for Second Christmas though
he wasn't dressed up as a Dalmatian puppy on this occasion which I did think was a bit of a pity. However he was wearing exactly the same Christmas jumper as me, with Ho, Ho, Ho written on the front. It shows that he has excellent taste, just like me. After
our Second Christmas Dinner we opened presents. This turned into something called Presentgate, if Nanni is to be believed. It all kicked off when Morgan opened his present from Nanni and Grandad which turned out to be something called a DinoCharger. Oh, how
I wanted one of those! Like, I really, really, really wanted one. I am sorry to say that I made my feelings known, in no uncertain manner. Mummy says I need to Control My Emotions and, believe me, I would if I only knew what Emotions were and what I could
do to control them.
Nanni wasn't cross with me, because she says she knows what it is like to be Overcome With Emotion. It's all down to something called the Usher Gene with which she is afflicted. Along with
my Mummy and my Aunties and other female members of the family. Women! Enough said.
Nanni says that everybody has to obey her house rules. These include No Rampaging. She also says, however, that anybody
breaking her rules will always be loved and forgiven in the usual way.