I like to think I am a good guest. I always arrive at the time I said I would (though I do have Mr B to thank for this; his middle name is Punctuality.) I park tidily (most of the time.) I always
ask if anyone wants to use the shower before me. And if my hosts want to watch a television programme which I don't usually watch myself, I watch it along with them, without protest, and ask intelligent questions to show my interest.
However, let's now take a look at these statements from the point of view of mine hosts.
I arrive: my host hears the car outside and wails: "Another five
minutes and I'd have finished hoovering!" He / she looks out of the window at where I have parked (tidily) and cries: "Why does she always park there!? The neighbours will go berserk....."
When
I take my turn in the shower: "How long does she take, for heaven's sake? Surely she washed her hair YESTERDAY?!"
And when I repair to my bed after watching X Factor: "Does she have to ask questions
about every single contestant, where they lived, what they do for a living, how many pets they've got. Doesn't she ever just WATCH a TV programme?!"
Not that they would ever breathe a word to
me. So, rather than me be an ideal guest, I suspect I am simply blessed with lovely people who welcome me warmly and let me come back again - and again - however annoying I may be.
I hope I am an equally good host. I am reminded of my father's favourite poem. In fact, my Dad didn't really "do" poetry, if you know what I mean. But he loved the sentiments in this three-liner - and so do I.
"Come in the evening, or come in the morning;
Come when expected, or come without warning.
Only - Come!"