It occurs to me that the title I have given to today's Daily Blog may unwittingly have alarmed you.
A missing pulse, after
all, sounds like a medical emergency and, from what you know of me, you will harbour grave doubts about my ability to bring someone back from a near-death experience. Indeed, many years ago when I was sent on a first aid course, my tutor poured scorn on my
mouth to mouth resuscitation technique, predicting that I wouldn't have the strength to keep going long enough to be a life saver. I remember feeling somewhat offended - followed by a fervent wish that I never be put to the test for the sake of the poor person
unknown whose life might depend on me.
Enough of such dark thoughts! The missing pulse on which today’s daily witterings is based is, in fact, the
Pulse bus - the same bus, you recall, which transports me to and from town on journeys which supply me with rich source material for the Blog on account of the fact that all Human Life is there on the Pulse bus. But not, it seems, this afternoon…
Picture the scene: we are gathering in our living room for the regular fortnightly meeting of our Nomination Whist group. Dear Kay, who helps me keep our house in some kind
of order, has tackled the task of transporting the card table and four dining chairs from the garage to our living room. (I apologised in advance for the state of the garage but Kay said, loyally, that it really wasn't too bad. Kay never makes you feel
bad about yourself. Had she been running the first aid course, she would have been gently encouraging of my aptitude as a life saver. Which may, or may not, have been a good thing had I ever been Put To The Test.)
We are due to start at 2 p.m. but Somebody Is Missing. What's more it is Delia who virtually never misses a session and always turns up on time, ready to take her place as scorer at the dining room table. At ten minutes past
two, I telephone her fella who confirms that she set off at the usual time. At quarter past, we reluctantly decide that we'd better start dealing the cards or we'd never get through our scheduled two games per afternoon. At twenty past, there's a ring on the
doorbell. Could it be, could it be, could it really be - Delia?!
I am always pleased to see Delia, but never more so than today, especially as she is All In One
Piece, if a trifle hot and bothered. What on earth happened, we all want to know? Which is when we hear about the missing Pulse.
Or, should I say, Pulses? The
Pulse bus runs every ten minutes. It is a Pearl Among Buses. Except that today Delia has waited 45 minutes and nary a Pulse has beaten a track to her bus stop, if you'll excuse the pun. What's going on? I hear you ask. And, listen up, the plot is about to
thicken - the bus which finally turned up and took pity on Delia was displaying a “Sorry Not In Service” notice. Nor was the kind bus driver inclined to explain what was afoot - though, presumably, quite a few would-be passengers had been forced
onto Shanks’s Pony by the non-arrival of their carriage and so were, quite literally, afoot.
We speculate on a sudden strike by bus drivers or a Disaster
at the Bus Garage, putting all the Pulse buses out of action. Our speculations are generally inconclusive because we are all supposed to be concentrating on our cards. The only sound conclusion we reach is that we can't trust a Pulse bus to turn up at
the bus stop in The Boulevard and convey Delia home at the end of the afternoon - so step forward Ted and Margaret with the welcome offer of a lift.
the buses be running tomorrow? Will the Pulse bus be transporting passengers into the heart of the town as usual? Am I prepared to risk it for a biscuit?
Missing Pulse. It's a mystery…