I was thinking today about being a lifeguard.
No, please, don't fret. I wasn't thinking about actually becoming a lifeguard. Last time I looked,
you had to pass all kinds of tests to be a lifeguard, like taking off your clothes in the water in a six-foot circle without going underwater (Mr B used to be a lifeguard so I have this on extremely good authority.) I have enough trouble taking my clothes
off in the health club's changing room when it's as crowded as it was this morning.
Plus I'm pretty sure you would need to be able to throw yourself into the water at a nano-second's notice.
You couldn't call: "Be with you in a minute!" to a drowning person, while you carefully lowered yourself, step by careful step into the water, then swam a stately breast-stroke in their general direction (given that, without specs, you might end up rescuing
the wrong person...)
So, no, I wasn't thinking that this might be a new retirement project. What I was actually thinking was how very boring it must be, being a lifeguard at my health club.
I was thinking this during this morning's aqua-aerobics session. We were doing spindles at the time and I am ace at spindles. I don't want to brag, but I can spindle standing on my head. Metaphorically speaking, of course, I wouldn't actually
stand on my head because this would involve Getting My Face Wet and, as you know, I do like to keep my head well above the waterline.
So very busy was I, thinking about the sad plight of the
lifeguards at the health club that I was still spindling when everyone else was spotty-dogging. I think the trainer might have scowled at me but, as I didn't have my specs on, it was hard to tell. I think she may have given up on me, to tell the
It would be much more interesting being a lifeguard at the public swimming pool, during the school holidays. When the Youngest of the Darling Daughters, her lovely friend Wendy and
I took an energetic teenage foursome swimming, back in August the lifeguards had a field day with their whistles, marking every minor misdemeanour (or bit of harmless fun.) I have a particularly fond memory of one of the fearless foursome's quite
spectacular cartwheel off the side of the pool and into the deep end - the lifeguard was quite red in the face from whistling.
See, that would be fun. But there is no fun at all being a lifeguard
at the health club's aqua-aerobics session, unless you count ticking off names on the register and handing out the "boggles." Even worse in the late afternoons which is the time I usually swim and when I'm often the only person in the pool.
I can't imagine just how boring it must be watching me swim. I'm yawning at the very thought of it.
Excellent news, by the way. Yesterday this website registered its 20,000th hit, while
the Daily Blog notched up a cool 10,000 hits. Thank you so much for continuing to visit and to listen to my random ramblings - whoever you all are.
Tomorrow I am off to Wales for
a few days so my exercise regime will consist of running about, trying to keep up with my little Welsh boys. It won't be boring, that's for sure. So if the Daily Blog seems a bit, well, breathless - that'll be the reason why...